Monday, August 18, 2014

Strawman Dialogues: LGBT Drama Edition

A: There you are! What are you doing on the balcony all by yourself? There's a party going on!
B: Hey. Just thinking, really.
A: Uh-oh. I know that look. You're not just thinking, you're -moping-.
B: A bit of both, I suppose.
A: Fine, then. What about?
B: Oh, just... thinking about how funny it all is.
A: How funny what is?
B: Everything. This party, for starters.
A: What's so funny about it? We're celebrating...
B: ..yet another state having judges legalize gay marriage.
A: That's right. That's GREAT news! The country has never been more accepting of gay, lesbian, trans..
B: Yeah, yeah...
A: It's true!
B: ... What does the world think of us?
A: What? That we're gay?
B: Yeah, and?
A: ...That we're... good... decorators?
B: They think we're delicate guys who want to settle down in monogamous bliss and live.. I don't know.. like Ward and June Cleaver, just we're both Ward.
A: So what are you...
B: ..With turtlenecks, lose the tobacco.. Probably adopting some asian boy instead of..
A: Whatever. So what are you saying?
B: How many cocks did you suck last week?
A: ...What does that have to do w...
B: Because I fucked five guys.
A: Well, it was another party.
B: Right. You?
A: I don't know.. three?
B: Oh, slow week?
A: Shut up. What's your point?
B: *laughing* That the country.. no, the whole world.. is celebrating and supporting an image of gay men that's largely fucking fake.
A: It is not, there's...
B: Exceptions. Like there are to any rule. You know better. You know who we know, you know the statistics.
A: But they don't talk about that side of things.
B: Oh, you mean we're safely in the closet? Well thank heavens for that...
A: Ugh, I... ... What about about lesbians?
B: Man, we're already retreating to that one?
A: Well?
B: Which ones are we talking about? The 75% who are obese, or the ones who eventually develop a taste for dick at rates that could have made Exodus International look successful if they took credit for it?
A: Fine! So there's a gulf between the image and the reality. It's still successful!
B: I'm not questioning the success. We're cheering on acceptance, and we aren't even accepted.
A: Well, give it time! The world is becoming more open to..
B: ...and I'm not sure I want us to be.
A: What?
B: You heard me. I don't know if I even want what acceptance would really mean. You know what I want? The freedom to do what I want without being beaten up. But who convinced me I needed safety in a spotlight? When did that become the brass ring?
A: I can't believe you're saying this.
B: Why?
A: Because it's self-hatred!
B: Or maybe it's self-honesty. Or self-doubt. Or even a little bit of wanting a taboo to remain taboo for the sake of breaking it. Maybe it's a lot of things. But most of all... maybe we're wrong. Maybe we're making mistakes. Maybe we need freedom as much as we need a culture that encourages us to be better. Maybe we're helping drag the world down, not lifting it up.
A: This is revolting. It's betrayal, it's sacrificing everything the LGBT community has worked so hard to...
B: Oh, public sanctification of ass to mouth. The victories I'm doubting...
A: You know what? Go to hell. Stay out here and be morose. I'm going back to the party. If you really think that way, maybe you should reconsider even coming to these things anymore!
B: ...Heh, the first sensible thing he's said in a while, and he was being sarcastic...

11 comments:

GoldRush Apple said...

Er, silly question, but is this based on a true events? The party that is.

Crude said...

Nah, this was - like most of the Strawman Dialogues - entirely made up. Well, aside from the references to the statistics. Including the obesity of lesbians, by the by.

Graham Esposito said...

What I can't wait for is a sincere, married gay couple to have to defend their marriage to a radical gender theory professor who condemns the entire institution as a tool of patriarchal oppression. In a culture where self-expression and the pursuit of pleasure are sacrosanct above all institutions, I have no idea where monogamy is supposed to fit in the deconstructionist narrative.

Crude said...

I'm pretty sure I've seen yammering by some people that gay marriage is a bad idea because it's just a tool by the bourgeoisie to try and tame the progressive sexual relationships of gay men.

lotharlorraine said...

I must say you utterly outwitted me on that one, Crude! :-)

It's clearly well written though.

Yes, it is true that too many male Gays have an incredibly promiscuous lifestyle. And if you try to tell them:

"Look, I'm a progressive Christian, I'm all in favor of Gay marriage because I believe that a life-long committed relationship is the best way to grow in love. But sleeping around does not conduce to such a noble goal, on the contrary it leads one away from virtues such a selflessness, patience, sacrifice and so forth..."
you (ironically enough) run the risk of being called "homophobic"!

In France, many people have been disgusted by gay marriage owing to the fact that so few homosexual activists promoting it are actually really interested in getting married.


Otherwise, although you won't agree with everything I wrote, I'd be truly delighted to learn your take on my new post about Dawkins.

Lovely greetings.

Crude said...

Lothar,

It's not just that the gays don't get married. It's also that a very sizable number of the ones who do, have open marriages.

And in France, the president's not married, has kids by (I think) multiple women.. and who in France cares? Who condemns that there?

I'll look at your post on Dawkins later.

lotharlorraine said...

In France, "Gay marriage" is called "The Marriage for all".


There's a wonderful joke about president Hollande by a right-wing politician:

"Hollande is for the marriage for all...except for himself!" :-)


He has tried to use Gay marriage as a way to mask his inability and unwillingness to fight unemployment.

He's going to get utterly crushed during the next elections.

The only thing I like about him is that he has given more rights to regional minorities, which could have contributed to keep the Germanic dialect in my region from dying out.

Alas, it's too late now.

Water into Whine said...

A masterpiece.

@comments, Marriage in modern contexts is more meant in the sense of social sanctification rather than discipline. Evidently nobody's going to get behind a movement for discipline in the name of hedonism.

Crude said...

Lothar,

The only thing I like about him is that he has given more rights to regional minorities, which could have contributed to keep the Germanic dialect in my region from dying out.

Alas, it's too late now.


I do sympathize with your situation on that front. But I also have to ask - what's the birth rate like in your area?

Water,

Marriage in modern contexts is more meant in the sense of social sanctification rather than discipline. Evidently nobody's going to get behind a movement for discipline in the name of hedonism.

Yeah, 'social sanctification' is about right. And even the social sanctification isn't all that desirable more and more.

GoldRush Apple said...

>>And in France, the president's not married, has kids by (I think) multiple women.. and who in France cares? Who condemns that there?

I think that's the point - to not care (but to care).

It's a very modern way of thinking. "Mind your own business, but if you don't - if you must have an opinion - make it either neutral or positive. As long as that person isn't physically harming whoever then it's okay."

I would guess that some will say as the long the kids are fine with the living arrangements, that they're happy (their dad is PM so they practically have whatever they want), then it really doesn't (shouldn't) matter.

I would also guess that many who hold such modern views in the States would want this mentality to be common.

This "who cares until it's negative, especially if it's sexual" mentality strikes me as unique and bizarre.

GoldRush Apple said...

How does one respond to "love is love" when someone advocates in favor for SS 'rights', or takes an "anti-bully (for LGBT)" stance? I just think such a manta is vacuous.